Shayealexa's Blog

WARPED – The Good, The Bad, and the Emo

shayealexa — Wed, 22 Jul 2009 19:52:32 +0000

I present to you my account, in pictures, of Warped Tour 2009. I took the liberty of documenting the best band shirts I saw walking around, as well as some of the worst, some honorable mentions, some recorded live performances… blah blah blah just look below.

THE GOOD

This is what REAL band merch looks like

NOT PICTURED: Dude w/ a CIRCLE JERKS T-Shirt, Dude w/ a DEAD KENNEDY’s T-Shirt…they ran away from me too fast to shoot

THE BAD

This chick should be shot….like with a gun…not a camera

Um, no it’s not the Gay Pride parade, it’s All Time Low at Warped Tour

Not Pictured: All 6000 The Devil Wears Prada T-Shirts, and every asshole that was cheering in front of the BrokenCYDE stage…may God have mercy on your souls…

Shaye-m on you…

shayealexa — Wed, 22 Jul 2009 16:41:24 +0000

So I went to Warped Tour on Sunday…ok you can stop laughing. I went for 7 distinct reasons: NOFX, Bad Religion, Less Than Jake, Flogging Molly, Gallows, Alexis on Fire, and to make fun of everyone there. Success on all accounts.

I present to you, the two shittiest bands atrocities I have ever come across in my entire life.

1. The Millionaires

What the fuck. Not only do these maybe 18 year olds look like complete whores, but they sing whine about getting laid, and boozing the night away. Mind you, the target audience is clearly the high school set, so way to go you sad pathetic excuse for entertainment. Not only have you made me jealous of Helen Keller, but you’re corrupting the youth of America, who clearly don’t need any help in that department. Kudos.

Oh side note: They got booed off the stage in CT, cause they LIP SYNCHED. To reiterate: The had a backing track, when they don’t even sing. Kevin Lyman should be ashamed of himself.

2. BrokenCYDE

There’s really not too much to say about these douchebags, except for the fact that they sound like a shitty LFO (yeah that’s right, I said shitty LFO) and look like dude-bros I’d see frequenting Murray Hill bars, right before they went back over their bridges and under their tunnels where they belong. God save the music industry.

Saddest part about both of these videos: There is a crowd actually enjoying the “music.”

A Day in the Life…

shayealexa — Sun, 12 Jul 2009 14:30:23 +0000

So just to sum up my weekend: yesterday I had to go all the way to Midtown West (it’s like, another world) to pick up my phone from the Iranian cab driver at a Hess gas station whose car I left it in the night before….but not before seeing the 10 for $10 show at Terminal 5, which is by far the worst fucking venue in all of New York City, and maybe the world. They were stingy as shit with all access passes and the sound is atrocious. However, This is Hell and Poison the Well rocked…hard. Poison the Well’s new album Tropic Rot is fantastic, so stop being a pussy and go get it.

Also, I’d like to take a minute to call out the band sluts of the world. I don’t really understand what the fuck you’re doing at a hardcore show in 6 inch heels and cocktail dress. It’s painfully obvious that your starfucking, which is fine, I have no problem with that. However it is possible to be a little less conspicuous regarding your agenda. Or, to save time and the minimal effort that it would take to get in your pants/miniskirt, you could probably just wear some sort of shirt with the letter DTF emblazoned in a bold, noticeable font, while carrying a basket of condoms that you throw out at random. I mean, that would just be economical.

I’ve got sick pictures from the show, but I’m too tired to deal with uploading them now, so you’ll get them tomorrow. Stop whining.

In Rememberence

shayealexa — Fri, 10 Jul 2009 16:06:31 +0000

I received some rather unsettling news today. There is this fabulous band, that you may not have heard of, and that would be a shame, but they’re called The Matches. Having been around since 1997, the Oakland based foursome are led by uber eccentric frontman and main songwriter Shawn Harris, whom I believe to be is one of the most underrated artists in music today. They announced that they are officially on “hiatus” and we all know what that means (yeah..I’m lookin at you NSYNC..reunion my ass). These guys are truly brilliant live and their latest Epitaph release A Band in Hope is truly a beautiful collection of everything from tear jerking waltzes, to mosh-pit worthy punk dittys. RIP The Matches…RIP.

Don’t call it a comeback….

shayealexa — Thu, 09 Jul 2009 18:43:35 +0000

And so it begins… I have no idea what the direction of this blog is going to be. Probably not the best opening line, but I can only promise that it will be interesting/infuriating/informative/ridiculous.

Disclaimer: I am an equal opportunity offender. I see no race/gender/religion/sexual preference…only minions of my judgement.

Fueled by an overwhelming (5+) response to a numerous amount (maybe 2) of hysterical (slightly humerous) Facebook statuses, I have gotten too big for my britches (not literally, I’m actually quite svelte) and have taken my witty reparte elsewhere. Basically, to sum up, I bitch too much for a 40 character or less status update. Thanks for stifling my creativity Facebook. Clearly, you’re a communist. Good day sir.

xox0

Gossip Girl

wait a minute…. that’s not right….